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Random Notes - May 5, 2003 
I've set the over/under on the date that the first fan falls off the top of the Green Monster to July
10th. Coincidentally, July 10th is also the over/under for the first date that a Red Sox reliever
pitches a 1-2-3 inning.
Iowa State head basketball coach Larry Eustachy is on the verge of losing his job after incriminating
photos of the 47-year-old coach drinking and partying with college students from the University of
Missouri were published last week. Meanwhile, new Alabama head football coach Mike Price was
dismissed from his job for putting himself in a questionable situation involving a stripper while at
a golf tournament in Florida. Price's actions violated the morals clause included in his contract.
I guess Price and Eustachy should have pursued a career where morals are irrelevant ...
like politics.
If I ever start a techno band, I will have a difficult time deciding whether to call my group Wolf
Blitzer or Hans Blix.
The most frivilous suit in legal history was filed last month when the Oakland Raiders asked a judge
to prevent the Tampa Bay Buccaneers from wearing their pirate-themed uniforms while playing
games in California because Tampa's logo "is likely to dilute the distinctive quality of the Raiders' mark,
thereby lessening its capacity to identify the Raiders and causing irreparable harm that cannot adequately
be compensated by an award of damages." The Raiders also sought a similar ban against the Carolina
Panthers because Carolina's uniforms include the colors silver and black. It is foolish enough to
think that the Buccaneers skull logo infringes on the Raiders "guy with eye patch" logo, but to include
the Carolina Panthers in the suit because their uniforms include silver and black proves beyond
a shadow of a doubt that Al Davis has now reached full-blown senility.
Does Davis think he owns the color combination of silver and black? Does Gangster Al feel that he should
have control over all things pirate? Compared to this lunacy, Davis'
demented claims that there is a league-wide conspiracy against him seem plausible. At this rate,
Davis will be having conversations with the endzone pylons by the end of next season. Simply astounding.
I've been wondering, if a vampire sucks the blood of a person with high pressure, does the
vampire himself get high pressure?
Penny Hardaway is the .com stock of the NBA. Maybe the Phoenix Suns should ask for a capital
gains loss deduction on Hardaway against the team's salary cap.
Has anyone seen "Joe Millionaire" and Java Man in the same place at the same time?
It is great to see some new blood in the latter rounds NHL Playoffs. Four of the final eight teams
did not even exist in 1990 - the Ducks, Wild, Lightning and Senators. Maybe if the Sens win the Cup
they will be able to afford a decent logo.
I'm willing to bet that the Mets are trying feverishly to trade for Braves pitcher Jung Bong. |
NOTES ARCHIVE
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